Idiosyncransies of a Small Town

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In Hawley, America, it is fashionable for middle schoolers to use this word:

beast / b ee st / n. / 1. Wickedly awesome 2. Totally cool 3. The best 4. Basically, badass.

For example, this sentence is written on my board right now:
Mrs. Thomas is beastly at art!!!

It is also fashionable to turn your shirt inside out and have your friends write all over your shirt with Sharpie. It appears that each signature should include some form of the word ‘beast’ to be acceptable.

The children are also prone to poking holes in the tops of the caps of their water bottles. This allows the children to drink by squirting water into their mouths, which is obviously much cooler (beastier?) than the old way of drinking. It is also extremely useful for squirting others and making loud noises as the plastic is crunched.

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